Freedom!

January13

Today is the first day that I have left the house on my own this year and although I had a hesitant start boy did it feel good!

Needless to say things have been rubbish. I have almost been to frightened to get up from the sofa in case I have a ‘power down’. Going food shopping (when I had enough energy) I had the constant worry of having an episode so I always had someone with me. Not exactly fun times but I have to keep focussing on the end point and keep shoveling the tablets down.

I picked up this DVD for a ‘rainy day’ but I’ve had so many of them I’m waiting for the ‘Mother of All Rainy Days’ to break the seal. Lets hope that the DVD stays in the box for a while 🙂

posted under Uncategorized

My advice for surviving benzodiazepine withdrawal
7:25 pm , September 22 , 2021

Acute withdrawal hell
7:35 pm , August 25 , 2021

Simply winging it with the help of Google – because that’s never a recipe for disaster!
4:25 pm , August 18 , 2021

Getting the ‘right’ help – part two
4:16 pm , July 21 , 2021

Getting the right help with benzodiazepine withdrawal…or so I thought
2:36 pm , March 12 , 2021

When the benzodiazepine withdrawal s**t storm hit
4:44 pm , March 5 , 2021

So, where were we?
5:05 pm , May 22 , 2020

Toxic mould – scary or what?
10:32 pm , July 17 , 2019

What on earth is Adrenal Fatigue?
4:53 pm , July 3 , 2019

Is this the winning combination?
4:24 pm , June 11 , 2019

Who am I?

Was – independent, intelligent (with plenty of dizzy moments), successful, busy, funny (depending on how much Prosecco I and the people around me had!), quite stressed out but overall happy, without even realising how lucky I was.

Now – ? just a mess really! I was diagnosed with Migraine Associated Vertigo (MAV) eight years ago when my life changed dramatically. It’s a variant of migraine that means I feel dizzy and tired nearly all of the time. If I try and do anything ‘normal’ this sparks of vertigo which gradually gets worse and worse until I pass out unless I lie down for hours, sometimes days. What this means is I spend 90% of my time in bed in a quiet dark room. Normal activities like shopping, walking, going anywhere bright or busy, the cinema even visiting friends who have patterned wallpaper or a gravel drive is a nightmare!

I’m continually trying new medications, all of them with quite nasty side effects (worsening of vertigo, weight loss, hair loss and sense of humour loss to name but a few) to try and find the magic one that will work for me. Fingers crossed the one I’m on now will work, time will tell.

A good friend set up this website so I could become a ginger whinger. No I’m kidding, so people can understand what I’m going through and maybe it would help me to have a bit of a rant. I have quite a dark sense of humour, I think that’s the only reason I haven’t gone completely bonkers! I clearly don’t have the most exciting of lives but I live in a small village with some entertaining characters and I’m always having blond moments (I blame the meds but I’ve always been a bit dappy!). Who knows I may even get better, and I can assure you life will be filled with amazing adventures then!

Scrap that! After zillions of Consultants all saying that they know what’s wrong with me and that they can get me better. Endless drugs and procedures I was finally Diagnosed with Chronic Lyme which was great – until I find out that nobody in the UK has a clue how to treat it. That complicates things some what 😉

@still_on_that_boat

Still on that boat…

Freedom!